Lovin You

Friday, July 8, 2011

I WANNA DIE

Sunday, June 12, 2011

Recently dont know why keep waking up late is it because he is no longer around. Maybe this is what my life should be, emo-ing.

So what if I really miss you, will you turn your back to look at me once? Will you turn your back and look at me once? So what if I want to see you now, will you fulfill my wish and come and visit me once? What i can say now is none of those above you ever do. Just now looking at your blog what I can see was all your flirting, will you ever grow up and start to treat those girls who are truly love you. How about your recent ex, she was so prefect, she is even more better than me like 100x, she is more gentle, more caring, give you the love is even more than what I can give you.

She is truly a very nice girl all this time seeing her with you, I really happy for you but now seeing your flirting problem reactivated again. When will you stop torturing such a nice girl??

SKIP

As for me I already stop finding for the right one actually I should say I give up. I give up to find, give up the rights to fall in love, I totally give up this life of mine now Im just dragging my feet to live, live for the sake of living cause to me honestly there isnt any meaning to continue to live on. Now for exact is actually even if I want to die those people who still care for me wont let me. Actually do think that if one day I died will anyone remember me, I think they will remember but as the time goes by I doubt anyone will remember me. They will continue to live their life like there isnt a person call Joey (that is me, my name).

[~Will you people still will remember me even if I had die, I doubt no right. Nobody will.~]

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Recently life quite sian..
Burn lots of oil for my exam on 6/06/11 but then my paper was like OMG..
Whole paper is like dont know how to do my mind was like BLANK totally..
His image keep flashing in mind..Hoping that he can fly to my side to comfort me..
But I know that is impossible he can no longer be there for me FOREVER..

After exam my mood was like HELL PLEASE JUST TAKE MY LIFE CAN YOU!!
My world is like missing a part of you..
Without you my life is incomplete totally incomplete..
Hell please stay with me I really need you now..
Dont leave me in the cold and dark places, you know that I my true self is a coward..
I not like what I present my self in front of others a brave and courageous, you know that totally..
Why do you still wanna leave me in cold and dark corner do you ever notice how much I cant do without you..

Even yesterday I went for my piecing my mind keep flashing your face to let me not to be afraid of that pain hoping after that moment you will be in front of me comforting me saying is ok I will be there for you forever..
I really miss your loving nagging please come back..
Wait for you really making me going crazy..
Really miss your voice, your jokes, your smile, your everything that keep me ongoing..
Will be missing you here..

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

I'm back to blogging for now maybe back to blogging when I'm free..

Recently my life is still the same as usual, studies studies and still studies cause my class test is coming but then I didnt even care about my class test though is very important but that person is not there for me. He is not with me, he is now having his army service but never the less he did comfort me at that moment of giving up living in this world..

At that particular day, I was totally at the brink of tears(but in the end I did cry somemore I cried for like from morning to afternoon) because of this particular person who didnt even give her best on the end-year project that we suppose to finish 50% of the project. But in the end we had to chiong finish our project within 2weeks which was totally impossible for us to finish cause the project was like 25% finished so if we use 2weeks to finish is still impossible..

That's when my emotion went awry I started to cry from my afternoon lesson which started from 1plus and I cried till 3 4plus then I messaged him telling him I wanna give up hanging there and end my life. After messaged him I did my retest for one of my modules.

Reached home started to use computer to forget everything that happen during the day just then during evening I received a call from him then I knew that I called my handphone but I didnt answered so he was very worried that why he called my house hoping that I will answer the call..

I was so shocked to receive his call, he started to console me, started to tell me to hang in there cause there are alots of people like her so he told me to be more optimistic cause this is one of the way to dont think too much and not to start to think too much. I dont know why everytime he start to console me or comfort me I will feel so happy that he is always there for me even I was so alone in this world like an ophan. He cares for me, dote me like no others guys did..

So I really want him to be with me side by side with me, I'm someone that is afraid that someone that I care for will leave me alone to face the storms even now I think about it I still will cry cause the feeling is like a part of your heart is being eaten away. I dont want!!! Facing the storms alone really makes my heart cold, I want my heart to be warm again..

Boy, I really like missing him even more every single day as he is the only guy soulmate I ever had..I really miss him alots..Hope that he can bring me to watch sunset..>_<

I promise I will try to find some time to upload some pictures of me recently as I bought new contact lenes..>0<

Monday, May 16, 2011

Today is such a very nice day nya..
Went to sch as per normal did all the necessary things for our EOY project actually quite funny though I was the only one preparing the information for my group presentation but ended my Felicia also help up to do after she did finish her Java project which I did anyhow by copying teacher sample and edit it here and there..

Asking friends whether later have the retest if not that baka teacher's lesson Im not going to go instead I rather go to meet my dearest bestest friend PeiSan. Meeting her was like going for a roller coaster so anxious cause we will like very long never meet up. At first we went to Lot1 wanna catch some movie but they said this week is public holiday week so dont have any discount so ended up we went to Causeway point to shop instead on the way we shop at Lot1 for awhile then moved on to Causeway Point.

Shop at Causeway Point de UNIQLO for awhile test out some clothes, in the fitting room I was like OMG I so fat le cause I cant even wear that pansu =0= (Gotta slim down on my food :'( ) Continue shopping with PeiSan shop until sian. So we went to Yew Tee Point instead. Wow I really miss that place my first job was at there but now the shop is not there anymore.

Both of us went to buy drinks and slip into LJS, talked alots of stuff like catching up some old times that we share together when we were in pri sch. Suddenly she give me some links of someone that we once knew. Actually that time she told me she saw him I was like "Really??? If I go and find him will he still remember me??" but now I dont wanna give myself any false hope so I dont even wanna think to much about it.

Just hope he will one day remember me and come to find me..M I very imaginative still thinking that he will remember me? Is had been like 5 or 6 years since we last met.? Please comment to let me know am I thinking too much..>_<

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Trying my best to bring my blog to live..

How about talk about things that happen recently cause I can only remember things that happen recently..Recently make myself a twitter account cause seeing that alots of my classmates having twitter and most of their times also spend on tweeting so I also wanna have to..

Honestly is because I'm someone that is afraid of being alone and I wanna be even closer to my friends..I dont wanna have any gaps between us hence I keep trying to be closer to them by tweeting but in the end most of my time is tweeting with those celebrities that I follow such as kamen-chan(kat-tun), taguchi-chan(kat-tun),yamapi-chan(NEWS)..They are very friendly and very humor too...

I never knows that celebrities can also be so humor to people like us the feeling is like a friend that we can talk to and is like they will cheer us up by tweet to us..Like once kamen-chan cheering me up by calling me bachiko..
To some may not know bachiko have alots of meaning but the most commonly is saying you are cute like hachiko..Or you are friendly; have a innocent heart; have a kind and caring heart..

Being able to be call as bachiko really makes me very happy...Feel free to follow me..I will be glad to be your listening ear or someone you can talk to..http://twitter.com/#!/nissy_lovingyou

Friday, April 22, 2011

AAA / 旅ダチノウタ

[Nissy, my baby, my darling..Dont sad dont emo like me, too emo not good for you..

You must stay happy as always cause I fall in love you is because your smile lighten up my life 5years ago so please dont emo..

kkk]